The Battle of The School Run

I'm onto au pair number four now. I suspect I've told you that having an au pair doesn't automatically make me 'posh'. People seem to think that it does, which means I have a chip on my shoulder about it all. So I'll quickly run through it once again, just so we're clear. I'm a single mum with a job that means I leave at 6am, and there's no childcare available that early in the morning. Plus at £60 a week an au pair is affordable. I pay mine £75 admittedly, but I'm just like that. So it's all good. Except it means I need a 3 bedroom place, which in Tooting starts at £1300 a month. So you see not only am I not posh, I'm poor. Glad you understand now. I wouldn't want you to think I'm posh. I don't mind you knowing I'm poor.

My au pairs childcare skills have varied a lot. I've had one sullen swedish teenager who barely took her ipod headphones out to hear what Amy wanted for breakfast, and I've had a loud Australian nanny who terrified me, and now I have Agi, the best au pair I've found. She's 28, and was a primary school teacher back in Poland, she told me her class cried when she told them she was leaving.

I'm used to au pair's playing with Amy when they're needed, then leaving me to do my Mum thing. With Agi it's different. I'll happily suggest to Amy that we draw, then Agi will sit down beside Amy and say, 'Or perhaps you want to play maths games on my laptop?'

At first I was glad that Agi took Amy out, or played with her on the computer, she even joined in and made teddy bears talk when Amy played 'schools.' Even though Amy was already happily playing teddybears with her schoolfriend.

With Agi taking good care of Amy I've had lots of extra 'me' time lately, to relax, to email Steve, to read, or write, or cook, or do the things I want to do... But you see, all I really want to do when I'm at home with Amy is to be with her.

It feels like Amy is a tug-of-love child. I'll say, 'Do you want to paint?' and Agi will step in, 'Or shall I take you to the playground?' I offer Amy a snack, 'Do you want a biscuit?' Agi will stand up, 'I'll get it. And would you like a drink too?'

Of course I can't complain, Amy must feel pampered and loved, and enjoy all this attention... Yeah, there's going to be a 'but'

If I have a day off and it's a school day I want to take Amy to school. Amy likes this too. Only Agi insists on taking Amy to school. I mean really insists. She seems like a meek, quiet, person, for most of the time, but when it comes to the school run she is determined to be the one to march Amy to the classroom door.

So I tell her, 'I like taking Amy to school.'

Agi tells me, 'I really want to take her. I must take her.'

Amy says, 'I want Mum to take me.'

Agi puts her coat on and says, 'Oh look, Matthew's coming down the road, if we go now we'll meet him.'

And somehow she hurries Amy out the door. And I take my shoes off and sit down with a coffee.

She's won.

But I had a plan for this morning, 'I'll take Amy to school this morning,' I told her.

'No, I'll take her.' Agi said.

'I want to take her,' I say to her. 'I have to go to the school office to pay the dinner money.' I have no intention of paying any dinner money, I'm broke right now, I'll have to ask Alex.

'I can do that for you,' Agi says. She puts on her coat.

'I need to go to the supermarket,' I say. I don't really, but I will if this is what it takes. 'I can take Amy to school, then go to the shops after that.' I put my coat on too.

'Can I go to school on my scooter?' Amy asks.

'No,' I tell her, 'I can't carry a scooter when I go to the shops.'

Agi has her shoes on. She picks up the scooter. 'I can take Amy to school on her scooter, so you can go to the shops,' she says.

Agi talks to Amy, 'I can take you to school on your scooter,' she tells her, and she puts Amy's coat on.

'Where's my PE kit?' Amy asks.

The PE kit is lost. I know this. Hurray! I say, 'I need to go to school, to ask if the PE Kit's at the office.' Victory is within sight...

Agi looks flustered, but she's grabbing the scooter now. 'I'll bring the scooter home, so you can go to the shops after school,' she says.

So off we go, all three of us. Plus the scooter too. I collect the PE kit from Lost Property box in the office, I don't pay any dinner money. I suppose I have to go to the shops.

I kiss Amy goodbe.

'Who's picking me up?' Amy asks.

I look at Agi. 'I'm picking you up, and Ruby's coming home with us.'

Agi says, 'I can collect both girls. I'd like to.'

'It's ok, I can do it.'

Agi goes to Amy, 'Can't I pick you up today?'

Amy says, 'I want Mum.'

'But I really want to,' Agi says. 'And if I don't I'll cry.'

Amy looks at me, 'Like Mum did last time?'

I hope Agi didn't hear that. I've been a bit fragile lately. Like last Monday when Agi took Amy to school, though Amy wanted me, and I felt like I was letting her down.

'So I pick you up from school?' Agi asks Amy.

Amy nods, 'Ok.'

And I go to the supermarket. And I don't cry this time. I needed shopping anyway.