Halloween Party - To Do List

I used to regularly throw Halloween Parties when I lived with my Ex. We had a big house and a dark-walled dining room. We'd put our poker tables down, and decorate the room to make it into a 'spooky room' for Amy and her friends. I didn't feel like coping with the work of a party on my own last October, but this year I've told Amy she can have her Halloween fun. Halloween parties are the best - they make me wish I was six. However some enjoyment can still be found as organiser of a spookfest.

Here's my 'To Do' list for our November 5th 'Forget Fawkes just show us the Zombie Spittle' Party...

Buy Toilet Paper
Plenty of cheap toilet paper is needed for the 'Wrap The Mummy' game. The best plan is to pick the naughtiest child then get all the other children to wrap them as tightly as possible in toilet paper bandaging, for as long as possible. Steve used to be a Green Party candidate, I hope he doesn't tell me off for the destroying half the rain forest with this game.

Find Cardboard Box
A box must be decorated and filled for the 'Yucky Dip.' 'Will you be Lucky, or will it be Yucky?' is written on the side of the box. You can guess the rest. Creative fun with wet rice krispies, mud, and empty snail shells! You have to throw in a few sweets too. That's the dull bit.

Mow Lawn
Steve's said he'll 'have a go' at setting off roman candles, and help to supervise the kid's sparkler sword fights. Unfortunately my back lawn grass is about a foot high, due to an ongoing dispute with my landlord about the provision of a shed. I'm embarrassed about the state of this jungle-garden. I know I can't really rely on Steve setting fire to himself as a distraction from the state of the lawn. So I need to get my hands on a mower. Unless a few strategically placed Crackling Inferno Fountains will burn the grass short?

Ring Up Old Friends
I have some friends who I only ever seem to see at birthday parties, Amy's parties, or else their kids. Yes, must ring Natasha. I hope a new baby wailing in the background will mean I can avoid asking, 'When's the baby due?' I've a feeling it was July. I know I've asked her several times already. Need to think of a general purpose question that will hide my crap-friend-ness and usefully reveal whether the baby's pending or now hatched.

Chop Carrot
I need to persuade Amy that making fake sick is a much better party activity than colouring in monster feet. You know the party game, 'Pin the tail on the donkey?' When we've mixed the sick I thought we might play a version of this called, 'Pour the sick on the witches face!'

Devise Game Rules
Amy insists we must play a game called, 'Follow the Monsters Feet.' Her idea seems to be that you make monsters feet, and then follow them... That's it. I prefer the making sick game. A compromise might be reached by following trails of fake sick?

Olives = Warts. Or else!
I need to plan the party food. Ideally the food should look spooky and taste nice. Cream cheese ghosts with raisin eyes do look creepy, but kids won't eat them. So then you get a different kind of horror story, it goes, 'Once upon a time there were squished bread bits under the sofa cushions...' Another idea is to make food that actually tastes nice, like pizza, but then scatter this with chopped olives and tell the kids to squint at it, and use their imaginations. Badly chopped green olives are troll's warts. Yes they are. Or else!

Buy Plenty of Wine
I told Steve that I'd 'think about' his plan to invite his friend Kate. He misunderstood and he's invited her and her family already. Which is fine. I would very much like to meet her. It was going to be a party involving 10 dressed-up 6 year olds. Now it's 10 dressed-up 6 year olds and a few grown-ups. I wonder if they like cream cheese ghosts, or making fake sick?

Use Imagination Whilst Exploring Sainsbury's Exotic Vegetables
We play a game where you get the kids to close their eyes and put their hands into a bag to feel something yucky. It's usually food, but I don't tell the kids this. If no one cries you're not playing this game right. A cut open passion fruit can be a squished eyeball. A knobbly gherkin might be a goblin finger. Wet spaghetti's good too. Worms. If you think of anything yukky whilst you're cooking tea, let me know.

Rottenize Tomatoes
I thought we might play a game where the kids can draw something they don't like and then throw squishy tomatoes at it. My only worry is that Steve will join in. We might be there all night while he throws tomatoes at his pictures. He'll have to stop when it's time to light the fireworks.

Rubber Gloves Aren't Just for Washing Up
Did you know that if you fill a rubber glove with green water and then put it in the freezer you can make a zombie hand? This is a, 'Read it on some web page' idea that you wish you'd never Googled. Don't try this at home. The most horrifying effect of this is the blood curdling screams you emit when you're trying to get icy hand out of frozen glove. My zombie's must be very undead, they always have lots of fallen off fingers. Still this is one idea that won't die... I'll be trying again this year. I'll get this right if those zombie hands kill me..!

Talk to Ex
A horrifying thought. But he has the 'Creepy Music' MP3 collection..

Get Sponsor
I like Innocent Smoothies. So I'm going to ask Innocent to sponsor my Halloween Party. They'll get their name on the invites, and they'll be the talk of Fircroft School! A case of smoothies should do it. Red ones, so I can say they're vampire's blood. How to get kids to enjoy 5 a day? Fruiful blood-juice! I don't know if Innocent will help. Even a couple of money-off vouchers will do me. Mmmm, smoothies...